BMET Jokes

Here’s a collection of 50 funny jokes tailored for Biomedical Equipment Technicians (BMETs)!

General BMET Humor

1. Why did the BMET bring a ladder to work?

Because they were always working abovetheir pay grade.

2. BMET Motto:

“If it ain’t broke, give it to us—we’llbreak it trying to prove it works.”

3. How do BMETs pray?

“Dear Lord, please let it be user error.”

4. Why do BMETs never play poker?

Because every time they bluff, the equipment beeps!

5. What’s a BMET’s favorite dance move?

The Electrostatic Shuffle—to avoid frying another circuit board.

Troubleshooting & Repairs

6. What’s the scariest thing a BMET can hear?

“It was working fine until youtouched it.”

7. Why do BMETs always check the power first?

Because 90% of problems are just unplugged cords.

8. Nurse:“The machine is broken!”

BMET: Plugs it in “Try now.”

9. Rule #1 of BMET troubleshooting:

If it doesn’t work, hit it. If it still doesn’t work, blame the manufacturer.

10. Why do BMETs love nurses?

Because they make them feel like wizards just for turning things on.

Hospital Life

11. BMETs and doctors have one thing in common:

No one listens to them until something stops working.

12. Doctor:“This monitor is defective!”

BMET: “That’s a clipboard.”

13. Why don’t BMETs work in the ER?

Because they’d spend 10 minutes searching for the user manual first.

14. A BMET’s job description:

“Fix what nurses break. Avoid what doctors touch.”

15. Why do BMETs drink so much coffee?

Because caffeine is the only thing keeping them from flatlining.

Power & Electricity Jokes

16. BMETs aren’t afraid of commitment…

But they dohave trust issues—with ground wires.

17. How many BMETs does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That’s Facilities’job.

18. Why do BMETs hate working on defibrillators?

Because every mistake is a shockingexperience.

19. BMETs love their job because…

It’s the only place you can say, “I just got shocked!” and people laugh instead of calling 911.

20. A BMET walks into a bar.

Immediately grounds himself first—just in case.

PMs & Paperwork

21. Why did the BMET break their keyboard?

Because they typed “PM Complete” one too many times.

22. Why do BMETs hate paperwork?

Because it’s the only thing they can’t fix with a screwdriver.

23. A BMET’s least favorite button?

“Print Work Order.”

24. PMs are like taxes:

You can’t avoid them, and they alwayscome at the worst time.

25. BMET’s version of horror?

Walking into a room and seeing a pile of untested infusion pumps.

Equipment Jokes

26. How do you scare a BMET?

Whisper “Joint Commission is here.”

27. Why don’t BMETs use hospital WiFi?

Because even theydon’t know what’s connected to it.

28. BMET pickup line:

“Are you an EKG? Because you’re making my heart skip a beat.”

29. Why did the ventilator go to therapy?

It had too many issues with pressure.

30. BMET Rule #2:

If you don’t know what it does, just call it “a module.”

IT vs. BMETs

31. Why don’t BMETs and IT get along?

Because BMETs know howto fix things, and IT knows how to reboot them.

32. BMET:“It’s a hardware issue.”

IT: “It’s a software issue.”

Manufacturer: “You need to buy the new model.”

33. BMETs love IT departments because…

They make them look competent by comparison.

34. Why do IT and BMETs avoid each other?

Because one wants to encrypt everything, and the other just wants it to turn on.

35. Why did the BMET refuse to update the firmware?

Because “if it ain’t broke… let’s not tempt fate.”

Random BMET Humor

36. BMETs are like Jedi.

They fix things with mysterious tools and nobodyunderstands how.

37. Why did the BMET take a nap in Radiology?

Because they needed to recharge.

38. BMETs hate elevators because…

Every time they enter one, they’re asked to fix something.

39. A BMET’s spirit animal?

The overworked multimeter.

40. Why do BMETs love working alone?

Because the fewer people watching, the less embarrassing it is when they forget how to put it back together.

Job Struggles

41. BMETs love job security.

Because hospitals will never stop breaking things.

42. BMET Superpower:

Finding the onemissing screw in an entire hospital.

43. Worst sentence for a BMET?

“We lost the service manual.”

44. Best BMET prank?

Swap the labels on infusion pumps and see what happens.

45. BMET career advice:

If you don’t know what’s wrong, just say, “It’s intermittent.”

Final Jokes

46. BMET version of “good morning”

“What broke today?”

47. What do BMETs do for fun?

Argue over the bestbrand of test equipment.

48. How do BMETs measure job satisfaction?

In ohmsof resistance.

49. Why do BMETs never get lost?

They just follow the sound of the beeping equipment.

50. What do BMETs and ghosts have in common?

They both fix things unseen—and nobody believes they exist!

BMET life is full of beeps, blips, and broken equipment—but at least there’s humor to get through it!